| Sunday February 18th 2007 05:58:09 PM EST |
Christian Slater Marathon--True Romance and Gleaning the Cube
Anytime I start having movie marathons featuring an actor of the quality of Christian Slater, I start asking myself the following questions. Did I take my medication? Has life become so bad that I have to resort to this?
However, despite a recent barrage of bad Christian Slater movies I was assured that he was in some quality pictures. This was confirmed when I watched Heathers a while back and enjoyed it.
In 'True Romance', Christian Slater is at it again with a rough, rugged personality mixed with an insane addiction to Elvis. Although his Elvis visions fall short of the demonic bunny in Donnie Darko, I have to say that any movie that features the King instructing someone to kill is worth the price of admission. The movie was all filled with an amazingly politically incorrect history lesson sure to make any liberal cry. The movie was fast-paced and funny in parts and all-around enjoyable. Spoiler alert: I was upset that everyone didn't die at the end. It seems that would have been more appropriate, but I guess the early 90s still subscribed to happy Hollywood endings.
'Gleaning the Cube' features Christian Slater as a skate boarder punk that is determined to prove that his adopted brother's death was not a suicide. This movie truly shows off Christian's acting versatility. Instead of a brown-haired punk imitating Jack Nicholson, he is a blond-haired punk imitating Jack Nicholson. This movie was good simply because of the great skate boarding sequences (don't try those tricks at home) and skating legend Tony Hawk chasing down the enemy in a big Pizza Hut delivery truck. Yes, this movie had everything. It was a simple action movie but had a coherent plot and was generally enjoyable. |
| Sunday February 04th 2007 11:26:17 PM EST |
Snakes on a Plane!
Yes, I accidently submitted a entry with gibberish in it. But I am too lazy to erase the error.
Do I need to say anything about this picture? The audience is expecting me to rip this movie up and say how ridiculous it was. I am sorry to disappoint.
This was a great movie in every way imaginable. It had action, brilliant acting, an airtight plot, etc. It also tried to break down stereotypes. What else could you want in a movie? I have a new great movie ranking: Godfather, Star Wars, Ghostbusters, and now...Snakes on a Plane.
In all seriousness, the movie was not half as bad as most other movies I have seen. It also was not quite as silly as I expected. If it weren't for the main plot being snakes actually on a plane, I think it would have been treated as a relatively serious action movie. The characters were incredibly shallow. The movie reminded me of Airplane! in many parts except that it was not supposed to be a comedy.
I am also giving this movie credit for its believability! Sure, little in the movie could actually happen. But the writers made an effort to justify little things. For example, they showed what appeared to be a bomb sniffing dog checking the luggage. This was used as partial justification for considering using snakes to bring a plane down instead of something a little more conventional.
If you want a good laugh and are in a light-hearted mood, watch this movie! |
| Sunday February 04th 2007 11:26:17 PM EST |
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| Tuesday June 06th 2006 03:42:00 AM EDT |
X-men III
Give it up before someone gets hurt! The movie was okay but was devoid of an interesting plot. There was plenty of fighting and thankfully the movie was willing to kill off some characters. Maybe I would write more if the movie deserved it. Perhaps I should just express my review with symbols which parallels the way the movie let the action dictate the plot.
... --- ... |
| Tuesday June 06th 2006 03:20:03 AM EDT |
Rumor Has It...but movie hasn't
What a boring picture? Should I expect anything else from Kevin Costner? Maybe I should watch "The Postman"...or not! To echo the Family Guy, why does Kevin Costner still make movies?
I enjoy Frank Capra but Frank Capra III!?--too much nepotism in Hollywood. I should have rejected this picture when I saw that Frank Capra III was the co-producer. |
| Tuesday June 06th 2006 03:04:41 AM EDT |
Jackhammer Massacre
Doesn't the title say it all. I watched many movies in the last month and probably will not be able to due justice to all of them or even remember all of them.
There was one memorable thing about this movie which featured a drug addict who kills others with a jackhammer. His jackhammer has, apparently, an infinitely long extension cord. As a side note, the jackhammer appears to be a rather awkward weapon, but I guess it makes for a good bad movie. |
| Sunday April 23rd 2006 12:06:48 AM EDT |
HA!
I noticed that I designed this blog with an inadequately short title field. This explains the truncation seen in the previous entry. Do I plan to fix this problem? Hell no! |
| Saturday April 22nd 2006 11:38:28 PM EDT |
10 Commandments--thou shall not watch crappy movies...Waiting (For a Joke)...The Man (in a movie wit
Is it true that I have really gone this long without watching any movie? Well, sort of. I have watched some TV and some movies have been on, but I have made little effort to watch anything in particular. When I did decide to rent some movies, I rented one great one and two crappy ones.
How could I possibly watch the movie "Waiting" within a day of the 10 Commandments--a true classic featuring a gun-wielding, I mean a walking stick wielding, Charlton Heston. Actually "Waiting" was a mildly amusing movie because its vulgarness was unrelenting. I can admire any movie that takes a stupid dirty joke and keeps reapplying it throughout the whole movie. Thus, it seems that watching this movie drunk or, in my case, really tired is ideal.
"The Man" probably would require an initial IQ of 50 plus drunkenness plus a bout of insanity plus depression plus ... Okay, if someone out there actually liked the movie, tell me, so that I can beat you with a rubber hose and mock you for the fool you are. I am not wasting anymore time reviewing this movie. |
| Wednesday March 29th 2006 03:12:05 PM EST |
V for Vendetta
I thought about giving a review using primarily words that started with the letter 'V'. But I figured that would be too creative and would be giving this movie more attention than it deserved.
In general, I thought this was a very good movie with good direction. In particular, I thought the crowd and mob scenes were well orchestrated. Even though I did not agree with all the messages in the movie, it was inspiring in its own way.
On the downside, this movie often took itself too seriously. Thank those responsible for the screenplay who were also involved in the Matrix. This movie also was quite silly in some parts. In my opinion, the greatest tragedy of the movie was when Natalie Portman shaved her hair. However, I did not expect her character to mind nearly as much as she did considering the fact that she was tortured in addition to getting her head shaved. Also, if the greatest tragedy was Natalie Portman's hair, the greatest torture sequence was definitely the sad attempts to show onscreen romance between V and Natalie Portman's character. In V, I found someone who is even more pathetic when it comes to dealing with women than myself.
I did not read the comics that this movie was based off of. Considering that it is supposed to be an idictment of Lady Thatcher, it is probably a good idea that I didn't. |
| Saturday March 18th 2006 02:41:54 AM EST |
Transporter 2--I no longer know what impossible means
Transporter 2 is a movie that makes impossibilities a reality. Almost every scene in the movie was so outrageous and so ridiculous that the film became an instant 'classic' for me.
I watched the film a few days ago and it represents my first movie in a few weeks. Fortunately, I was not disapointed. This movie was every bit as bad as advertised which made it great.
At one point, a plane falls from the sky and lands in the water and the 'Transporter' survived. In another instance, the 'Transporter' drives his car off of one building to another one several hundred of feet away. The acting was classically bad and the movie had enough plot holes to sink a whole fleet of Titanics.
In other words, this movie was a blast and I highly recommend it to anyone wishing to reduce his mental capacity. |
| Saturday February 18th 2006 02:33:02 AM EST |
The Exorcism of Emily Rose
I don't go into every movie expecting the worst. For this movie, I expected something of decent quality. The movie did not completely disappoint. For some reason, I find movies based on exorcisms incredibly interesting. This is not to say that all movies with an exorcism theme are good. I suppose, technically, one could say that Constantine was an exorcism movie of sorts and the reader knows what I felt about that movie! Perhaps, I like movies about things that cannot possibly happen to me. Regardless of whether demonic possession exists, one thing is for certain. No demon would ever waste its time possessing me. In fact, the hypothetical 'exorcism' would probably entail me looking into a mirror or just saying a few sentences. After this horror or torture, the demon would simply give up the possession and try to find a better target.
Anyway, in the movie a priest is charged with negligent homicide of a young lady who died under his care and after performing an exorcism. The movie primarily involves a legal battle where flashbacks are provided to show parts of Emily Rose's exorcism along with her other experiences. The flashbacks are well done and are the highlight of the picture.
Although I enjoyed the movie, there were several problems. The defense attorney who I call the cocktail lawyer seemed to always be in a cocktail lounge and never really working on the case. The trial itself was like a circus and the ending seemed a little too perfect or dramatic when so much drama did not need to exist. The prosecuting attorney, who my roommate conveniently nicknamed, the anchorman, had a funky hairdo out of the 70s. His courtroom manner seemed silly and exaggerated.
I would recommend this picture, but I must confess that I am happy that I am not a lawyer. I probably would have really criticized the legal aspects of this film then. |
| Sunday February 12th 2006 02:11:56 AM EST |
Constantine is Constant Pain
I decided to scrape the bottom of the barrel Saturday night and watch a Keanu Reeves movie, Constantine. I actually found the movie surprisingly captivating because each ludicrous plot turn made me look forward to the next with more vigor.
In this movie, John Constantine, possesses some kind of ability to see demons and angels. He performs exorcisms among other things to hopefully win his way into heaven. This movie makes up all sorts of ridiculous characters and powers. I was never really sure where the plot was going to go because logic was clearly thrown out of the window when the movie began. My favorite part was when John's sidekick apparently dies and for no good reason but to get him out of the current shot. It was beautiful watching their relationship develop from nothing to something with no in between.
I really wish someone would give Keanu Reeves the memo that tells him to stop acting. Everyone else has gotten the memo. If he would have stopped at Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, he would have spared everyone a lot of agony.
I watched this movie on DVD. The best part of the DVD was the preview for the Seinfeld DVD. If only I would have stopped there? |